Why? Why was is so hard to quit that stupid social media craze? 10 years ago this stuff didn't exist and we survived. I survived not knowing what everyone was doing 24 hours a day. They survived without knowing what was going on in my life 24 hours a day.
Growing up Catholic we always gave up meat on Fridays during Lent. (For those of you who don't know, Lent is the period between Ash Wednesday and Easter Sunday and is geared toward spiritual purification and penance. It lasts about 40 days and is symbolic of the 40 days Jesus fasted in the desert and was tempted by satan.) But because we were kids, we always had cheese pizza on Fridays for dinner instead. So really it was more of a treat for us than a fast. As an adult I tried to carry on the no meat thing but it never failed that I forgot and ate meat.
"Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. He fasted for forty days and forty nights, and afterwards he was hungry. The tempter approached and said to him, "If you are the Son of God, command that these stones become loaves of bread." He said in reply, "It is written: 'One does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes forth from the mouth of God.' " Matthew 4:1-4
This year I decided that I was going to fast from something that I enjoyed. Something that would truly be a sacrifice. I wanted to use it as a way to better myself in the process. So I finally took the leap and took a break from Fb.
I haven't even really missed it all that much. I forgot to turn off email notifications so every now and then an email will come through saying how many "friend requests" or "notifications" are pending and that makes me soooo curious but I've resisted the temptation.
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| "Watch and pray that you may resist temptation. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak." Matthew 26:41 |
Update: Perfect example right here, I just got done cleaning out my email inbox and my brain phrased it like I would update my status, "Just got done cleaning out my gmail inbox, haven't done that since 2012!" Seriously, Sara, who cares about that crap!
That is (excuse my language) fucked up! Why is my brain thinking this way? How can I get it to stop?
If you are my Fb friend you already know that I'm addicted to it. I like to post things about my life all the time... but why do I feel the need to share everything? Is it for likes or comments? Probably. So then why do I feel like I constantly need the validation of my Fb "friends"? If Fb or MySpace (RIP) never existed I'm positive I would not feel the void of not being able to tell everyone about my life and how many likes I received.
I put friends in quotes because, lets be honest, there are real life friends and then there are Fb "friends". Fb "friends" are the friends you were or would never be friends with outside of the internet. You weren't friends in high school and some of them you wouldn't even wave at if you saw them on the street but you comment or like their Fb posts.
So how do I feel now that I've been off Fb for a week and a half?
I feel fine. I'm not sad because I don't know what everyone else is doing. I really, honestly, don't miss it that much. I am really happy that I am taking a Fb break so that I could come to this realization and hopefully if and when I return it won't be such a fixture in my life.
There are a couple things that I really do miss about Fb. One, is the invites. People don't send regular email evites anymore or snail mail. (Do people use that term "snail mail" anymore... does anyone born after 1990 even know what that term means?) So there may be events that I am missing. But truthfully I don't go to half of the crap I'm invited too on there unless it's from one of my real life friends. (And they would probably text or call me anyway so this one is kind of a moot point.) The other thing I miss is actually some of those Fb friends that I ONLY talk to through Fb. I should have gotten regular emails or phone numbers from some people on there who I actually want to keep in contact with during my fast. (Krissy, if you are reading this you are one of them! Email me!)
The one thing that Fb was really helpful with was when Harper died. It was a good way to inform people of our loss. The worst thing was running into someone who didn't know what happened and having them see that I wasn't pregnant anymore and asking me "How is the baby?" or "How's the new mommy?" and thanks to Fb it only happened once from a friend who isn't on Fb and a handful of times at work. If I wasn't able to share it on Fb I know it would have happened all the time and I probably would have never left the house out of fear. At that point in my life the comments and love I received through Fb were so appreciated and I felt love from friends and "friends" all over the country. My husband and I would take time each night to read the comments from everyone and it was so emotional and healing to know we were being thought of and prayed for.
I've decided that I want to spend more time blogging. And some may say well you are just trading one social media outlet for another. Yes, that may be true but with Fb I was constantly connected. I could log on from my phone and I was always checking in. With my blog, I've set aside specific times every week to write and when I'm done I log out and it's over until the next time. I don't waste time scrolling through the blog to see everyone's status updates but I can still keep people that are interested updated on our little family. That's the difference.
Well this post turned into a longer one that I anticipated. But I think they usually do. Once I start, it's hard to stop. :)
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